1 Corinthians 13:4-8

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

i am not patient, i am not kind. i envy, i boast, i am proud.  i am rude, i am self-seeking, i am easily angered, i keep record of wrongs.  i delight in evil but do not rejoice with the truth.  i dont always protect, dont always trust, dont always hope, dont always persevere…..

i have much to learn about this whole LOVE thing


 

TRUST
 
i’ve been meaning to blog but never did find the right words.

i’ve just watched a bit of ‘dont tell the bride’ while having my midnight snack. there was this one scene where the groom-to-be announced that the bride-to-be was to be blindfolded when she tried on her dress the day before the wedding. the point was that the guy wanted to show her that he can be trusted to make her look nice. 

but the woman being a woman cried in protest, she sat there at the dress shop refused to try on the dress and said ‘im not getting married if i cant see the dress before hand, what if he has chosen something really ugly?’. in the end, the bridesmaids had to force the groom-to-be to change his mind and allow the bride-to-be to see the dress.

when she saw the dress…. she loved it…. she even said ‘wow, he has chosen better than i would have’….. ¬.¬

that annoyed me so much…. she did not trust her HUSBAND-to-be at all. she cried and protested to manipulate the situation. what would have been a wonderful surprise she turned into a tantrum-throwing-i’ll-kill-you-if-i-dont-get-my-way scene.

but then i was gently reminded by God….

im just like that bride….
God knows me inside out, top to bottom. He knows what i like, what i dont like, He knows exactly how i feel. and yet, i dont trust Him to give me the best…. there are so many things in life that maybe God wants to surprise me with to show just how amazing He is…. yet i cry, i yell, i protest. demanding my ways, demanding that i see everything before it happens. just incase i dont like it….

even if God tells me right now that He has prepared a wonderful husband for me… i wouldnt know how to trust Him… is like… if i dont get to ‘train’ this person before he becomes my husband…then he just wont be good enough…

Proverbs 3:5
‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not your own understanding.’

im sorry Lord for my mistrust…. sorry for always trying to gain control in everything. teach me to trust in You… coz i dont seem to know how

100_8318e-pola

it’s truely sad that i dont know how to trust You….